Peace and Rest

I heard it said recently, that the greatest person we have to overcome in this world is ourselves. David, one of my new favorite characters, lived this true. Sometime around the end of his reign he had a census taken, eventually he realized that this was something God did not want him to do, so he approached God for forgiveness. So as a result, God sent his prophet to relay a message for him, God would allow him to choose his own punishment. He had three choices,“Shall there come on you three^[b] years of famine in your land? Or three months of fleeing from your enemies while they pursue you? Or three days of plague in your land? Now then, think it over and decide how I should answer the one who sent me.” David eventually chose the three days of plague throughout the land. After I read this I had to wondered what it was that drove David to force the people of Israel to pay for his sins, there was only one option of the three that actually would have caused him to pay. Something like 70000, Israelites were killed because of his choice. And eventually he came to his senses, and asked God to hold only him accountable for his sins.

Looking further people throughout the Bible have had this struggle to overcome self, Peter, and Jonah, so many of their issues just lied within. They had been surrounded and exposed to a world that taught the one thing, and in the time of greatest testing they turned to their inward emotion. Peter denied Jesus, after walking with him for so long, he had a fear that overcame the years of his friendship. Jonah, despite knowing God's call chose to run, as if you can run from an all present God.

I consider all this to say, that it's really easy day to day to point our issues and problems at someone else. But there are things that no one else can do. No one else can make decisions for me, I make them, and I live with them. I guess this is so important to me, because I feel as though a lot of time we give a lot of power to forces and people around us, by saying that they've driven us to do so much. Without giving acknowledgment to the cross and how much it's freed us from. My grandfather once told me (And I'm sure other have said it), that Satan's great deception, was confusing you about who you are. Because if we knew and accepted who we were, we'd understand the overcoming power we have through Christ, and the authority we have on this earth.

Yesterday, I got to catch up with Dorothy. Who for many years has been one of my most trusted friends. And no this is not a reflection on friendship, this is actually a reflection on rest. I suppose one of the best things about having a great friend, is knowing that you can honestly share with them. So many times in life, just the burden of knowledge can become so cumbersome. It becomes a constant weight, on our hearts. And oddly enough a driving force to weigh us down from where God is probably trying to move us. I guess in considering this, It brings to reality one of the many strengths in prayer. We cast our burdens on someone who is really able to carry and help us untangle the web of thoughts we are trying to process. This is perhaps one of the most loving things God allows us to do. We don't deserve such access to him, yet freely he has given it to us.

I said that this was a reflection on rest, because I really feel like rest is the releasing of burdens, and the peace of knowing that theres really no need to worry. I am definitely a worrier, and I have very little doubts about God and how much he is capable of, but something within me tends to worry when I have to rely on the people around me. It isn't even a lack of faith at times, I guess it just feels like certain experiences of being let down have become all consuming. Which is why it becomes so important to release those worries to God. Lately, that's really where i've been at. I feel so much uncertainty about my future, and about what i'm supposed to. Or maybe i'm just afraid to make decisions and step out. Whatever it is, it's frustrating, and leaves me quite anxious, and doubtful. So i've just been asking God to show me, and lead the way. And for some reason, I find peace in that. Even when I don't have the answer, things just feel better and more at ease. So many times we don't look to him for his promises, so we never experience the fullness of his word.